Things I Can’t Take Back: I Still Like Creed


Have you ever done something so lame, so embarrassing, so unbelievably STUPID that you visibly cringe, regardless of where you are and what you’re doing? Lord knows I have. I’ve got a ton of those under my belt. So I figure, why not share those with you? You know, you are my friends and all.

THING I CAN’T TAKE BACK:

I STILL LIKE CREED

Arguably, this is how pretty much everyone acts when they hear this album.

Arguably, this is how pretty much everyone acts when they hear this album.

Screw you. I feel the judging. I hear your snickering. You mock me rightfully, and I know in five years I’ll look back on this one and put it up there in the all-time, “What the hell was I thinking?” category. I’m totally, completely aware of this.

Doesn’t change the fact that Creed rocks so hard.

I see what you did there.

I see what you did there.

I know exactly where I was when I heard “Higher” for the first time. I was waiting for my JV basketball game against Buckingham, Browne and Nichols (which was always a good win; you got to pretend that you beat 3 teams. Cheeky). Brendan Rampi was listening to the Creed album, and I habitually “borrowed” CDs from him. I think he forcibly took back his Rage Against the Machine album, and I swiped Creed like a young Mark Wahlberg in “The Italian Job.”

That first riff in “Higher?” Are you friggin’ kidding me? I rocked out, friends and lovers. I was so amped I dropped career JV numbers on those fools! 8 points, BBN! Suck on that, shorties!

I was hooked. Creed rocked hard. I didn’t care if Scott Stapp thinks he’s Jesus or if he was stone drunk in arena venues singing “I’m a little teapot” over “My Sacrifice.” You think I listen to Creed for the lyrics? Get off my plane.

"All I said was that Scott Stapp's voice bears a RESEMBLANCE to Eddie Vedder's."

"All I said was that Scott Stapp's voice bears a RESEMBLANCE to Eddie Vedder's."

Scott Stapp may be a douchebag, but he’s a douchebag who fronted at least three legitimate pump-you-up-dick-slap-a-stranger rockin’ tunes.

A few months ago my girlfriend woke up to me and a Rock Band guitar, furiously jamming to “Higher.” Was she thankful for this gift of rock? No, that’s why I was on top of her. You don’t walk out on Creed. In a related story, don’t fall asleep tonight.

 Now, unlike my other forays into the unbearably embarrassing, I KNOW I’m going to look back on my Creed days and want to kick my own ass. The signs are everywhere. Creed was a punchline on “How I Met Your Mother” last week. Music magazines skewer them so bad, even Fred Durst is saying, “Just leave the poor bastard alone already.” And despite Scott Stapp’s money and influence, Eddie Vedder is still alive. I imagine he’s also ordered a hit out on Nickelback, I mean, the dude owns TWO MP-5s! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Stapp#Controversies

"I sent Eddie the pipe bomb in the box filled with our CDs...did he REALLY not open it yet??"

"I sent Eddie the pipe bomb in the box filled with our CDs...did he REALLY not open it yet??"

But even after all this, and fully conscious of how lame I am, I will still rock me some Creed. You’re welcome to point and laugh as I wail away on my air guitar and bask in the pseudo-Christian rock, but Jesus is totally head banging with me.

oh.

oh.

Maybe not.

I’m your friend, Woody Tondorf, and I still like the music of Creed, and that’s something I can’t take back.

At least they’re not Nickelback.

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11 Responses

  1. Scott passed out in the urinal next to me at Jones a few years back. I couldn’t help myself and suddenly had poor aim. He sings with a piece of gum in his mouth and stinks of my urine.

  2. You’re an American hero.

  3. You remember exactly where you were the first time you heard “higher” by creed? wow.

    most people say “i remember where i was when kennedy got shot” (older people) or “i remember where i was during 9/11” (younger people)

    but you, you remember higher.

    Do you own the greatest hits collection? it only has two tracks:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greatest_Hits_(Creed_album)

  4. That song was THAT good to me. I must have listened to it about 11 times that day.

    I don’t need you. All I need is Creed.

  5. …you do realize i’m breaking up with you, yes?

  6. there there, woody. it’s alright, buddy. nobody likes you ’cause you have good taste music.

  7. I’ll admit the same, Woody. I’ll admit the same.

    I still own like…two or three Creed albums. And they’re not going anywhere. I still would slap anyone who tried to switch off ‘Higher.’ So. Yeah. Will I likewise be slapping myself in times to come? Who knows. But I’m gonna cling until then. 😉

  8. so, do you still like them?

    • No comment. 🙂

      • new album kicks ass guy.

  9. In 2013, I STILL love creed, and I don’t give a flying fuck what any of you bitches think about that. Say what you will about stapp, but his music and lyrics are awesome, and unlike the author, I will NOT look back in 5 years and be ashamed of that. 🙂

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